I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
