You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
