Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
