i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Randomize
