Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
