have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize