she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
