is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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