remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
