We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize
