Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
