ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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