Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
