Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Randomize
