is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
