Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
