Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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