We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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