"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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