I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
two words...techno handjob
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
50% drunk capacity currently
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
