U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
