How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
