As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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