My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
