nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize