Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
There's always time for handjobs
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
