I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
