Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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