Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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