my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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