i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
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