Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
