Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
