we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I'm passing your future prison.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
