wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Randomize
