remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
