Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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