Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
