Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
They took my balls.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
