I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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