I can't watch pbs sober anymore
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
