Just mADE A PArabola og urine
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
