i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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