you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Randomize
