you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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