im gay
i know
yea but for you.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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