Where did you get a picture of my penis
babies were throwing up all over the place
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
