So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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