just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
