Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
